It’s a fallacy to think you can’t survive a plane crash. In fact, surviving the impact is easy, it’s escaping the burning fuselage that takes talent.
1. Don’t drink. Hard, I know, but studies conducted by airlines in the aftermath of deadly evacuations show that the people who comprised the human brickettes left behind were most likely the drunks.
2. Look behind you. People tend to run forward in a panic, but often the difference between life and death is a simple glance over your shoulder to see that the nearest exit is behind you.
3. Leave everything. True fact: “Leave everything!” is now a command that flight attendants are trained to shout during a crash because it has been proven that passengers die their idiot asses dead trying to gather their personal effects before fleeing the fire-engulfed fuselage.
3. Count the rows to your nearest exit. You will probably have to feel your way out of a smoke filled cabin.
4. Crawl out at armrest level. Smoke rises while noxious fumes sink, so the safest air to breath will be between the two.
6. Don’t be afraid to speak up. A deadly crash in New York during the nineties could have been circumvented if any of the numerous passengers onboard, who later admitted to noticing ice on the wings, had alerted the flight attendant that they noticed ice on the wings. One of them was an off-duty pilot, who should have known better.
7. Sit near an exit. The closer you are to an exit, the quicker you get off the plane, the less smoke you inhale, the more likely you live.
8. Keep your head down. Upon impact, debris can fly through the cabin, debris that probably includes the decapitated heads of any passengers who didn’t keep their heads down.
9. Sit in the front. Exits abound in the front of the plane. Not only do you have the left and right exits on either side of first class, but the cockpit has an additional exit, and the period following a plane wreck is one of the few times passengers are allowed to charge the cockpit.
10. Travel in larger jets, such as the Boeing 777, 747, Airbus, etc. These planes have double aisles, as opposed to the 737 and 757, for example, which are single-aisle aircrafts. Think about it: The point is to escape the burning fuselage. It’s easier to do that when there are two paths to freedom.
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